We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Rose Water

by Tony Manfredonia

supported by
Christoph Jakob
Christoph Jakob thumbnail
Christoph Jakob Love the build up in "In Good and Bad Times", this is without a doubt my favorite song on the album. "Shockwave" gives me Foals vibes and that "Hurt" cover was a nice surprise. Awesome stuff! Favorite track: In Good and Bad Times.
/
1.
For the most part, you're past that point, that breaking point of you may die. What would you say hasn't changed? I feel like back then, my life was over. What do you mean by that? I felt like discomfort and pain equaled my life was over. But I feel like now it's just kind of part of the story. Like it's just life. Life. Life hurts and life sucks and life is hard. Maybe not for everyone, but for some people it is. Whether it be physical suffering, or emotional suffering, or the death of a loved one Or the hurt of someone else, you know... I think that's just life. I think life... I think a lot of people shy away from pain in general. And I think they disconnect from others who are in pain Because they don't want to face it, they don't want to acknowledge it or deal with it. But I think the reality is in this life, death exists, and physical pain exists, and mental anguish exists. And they're all things that I've experienced, and will always kind of experience To some degree.
2.
Shockwave 02:50
In death, there'll always be a sacrifice You think you want relief, but what you need is life Miles and miles of water down below But home, home is where you need to go. And now, you're on the edge One step will be a never-ending shockwave You feel there's nothing left Reach out and take ahold of my hand Your thoughts are thoughts and all they'll ever be Don't let the demons live, don't set them free And now, you're on the edge One step will be a never-ending shockwave You feel there's nothing left Reach out and take ahold of my hand My hand My hand My hand My hand
3.
Rose Water 04:23
Here you are, food and water Here you are, still asleep, still lost From afar, you may seem to function But oh, your wire's cut And oh, your charge is gone Taking shots just to think clearly Iodine staining all the wounds of your body And it's killing me Your whole life's been nothing but rose water Wiping dirt off the center of the universe And I know it hurts 'Cause there's only so much time Before time itself runs out But there's still some time to live this life You may fear an endless battle You will bleed But in the end, in the end at least you'll run 'Cause there's so much more than constant slumber The morning comes The light, oh the light begins to dawn Taking shots just to think clearly Iodine staining all the wounds of your body And it's killing me Your whole life's been nothing but rose water Wiping dirt off the center of the universe And I know it hurts 'Cause there's only so much time Before time itself runs out But there's still some time to live this life There's still time There's still time There's still time Don't be afraid to suffer, just hold on tight Don't let your pain become a parasite
4.
Here I am, here I am on my knees again Regretfully doesn't change the course of history Even when you need nothing more than charity Still I turn the other way Oh, I turn the other way Still I stand, still a poison meets us at the end 'Cause what I think is so distant from reality Wrongfully, I take control of what I think you need And I turn the other way Oh, I turn the other way And I know that the choices I make Always end with a price left to pay And I know that I just need to stop But I'm tied up Not sure what's right or wrong Looking back, a hundred times I thought of nothing more Than of myself, did away with everything you felt I deserve every bit of every hurtful word Don't feel bad for what you've said Don't feel bad for what you've said 'Cause I know that when promises break It tears a hole in the home that we made And I know that I just need to stop But I'm tied up When every single time I lose all sense of judgment Lose control and end up causing Dissolution, caught between us Force me back into my calling In good and bad times In good and bad times In good and bad times I will love and honor you All the days of my life All the days of my life All the days of my life All the days of my life
5.
Dusk at Dawn 05:03
The first memory I have of my father is laying on his chest I listened to the beat of his heart while the blue light coming from TV Flickered off the walls and glass photo frames, hanging in the night-fallen living room The second is eating pancakes early in the frosty morning before school Him coming inside smelling of exhaust fumes and winter chill with half a pencil behind his ear The top of his hat comically drooping, he placed his polar hands on my back and chuckled as I stiffened The third is playing catch on a mellow summer evening in our quiet neighborhood As he sat on the front porch with a beer and newspaper Coaching me on football tactics with a contented grin on his face The fourth is cleaning out his work truck Earning my first dollars and having a taste of how the world goes round Many images and audibles flood in between Shimmering sapphire A rolling inlet The whir of a truck The musty smell of old plumbing parts Tootsie Weathered hands tying a knot The splash of a fish A raggedy baseball cap A pat on the back Eggs and bacon for breakfast I worked alongside of him opening and closing cottages every spring and fall Usually getting annoyed by his unceasing sprightliness Nosy talk with the smoky cashier at the time-worn gas station in Good Hart And boundless trust he placed in my capabilities Despite very little knowledge and direction Despite army crawling straight into my claustrophobia Underneath houses Over rusty nails, spiders, and corpses of mice While exposing my back to sizzling pipes Hovering threateningly above I held dear every second of it Because I was with my dad I was helping my dad Every June through September I looked forward to going to our favorite fishing cove at The Cabin With the peculiar name of Gut Port Where he taught my husband how to cast a line Just as he had taught me as a kid He had plenty of quirks One of them was playing exactly two songs by Johnny Cash on his battered phone As we hiked on the gravelly trail to reach the sheltered bay Timing the duration perfectly so the second song ended just as we had arrived Much to his satisfaction Going fishing with dad at our special location Deep in the cedar woods full of northern wildlife Was my all-time favorite activity Little did I know that this summer would be dreadfully different And that the one place I found such beauty, joy, and serenity Would now bring unspeakable sorrow from the depths of my heart "Dad's gone. He's gone." I felt the blood drain from my head, and what seemed like my soul, at the sound of my brother sobbing over the phone Everything became incoherent, as I knelt onto the cold garage floor Heart racing Heart sinking Mind breaking I wake up every morning to an inescapable nightmare I put on my crown of thorns Hoist up my cross And carry it to the daily beatings Having felt like I've been kicked in the stomach 300 times I attempt to do the most menial of tasks But the 300 kicks turn into 300 pounds Weighing heavily on all of my bones I remain awake until early morning Because when I close my eyes, I see myself as a girl Standing before her father with the noose around his neck Screaming, "Dad! Dad! Why won't you come down?" My brain grapples at a way to undo the already-did. It struggles to think of a strategy to reverse time To make the fragments of my imagination real Or meet him in another dimension As if they are now obtainable possibilities It fights to find him To go to him To help him I walk down old country roads and gaze at the meadowy sea of rippling green Dappled with maroon and ivory Swaying in the breeze with the large maple leaves waving Suddenly, I am riding shotgun in his unkempt work truck on a dreamy July evening Crickets chirping in bursts as we drive by with the windows down Allowing the sweet smell of freshly-harvested hay waft in We are coming home from The Cabin Or getting wood Or checking out the ponds Or maybe just taking a drive I snap myself back into a world gone cold Walking alone in the future aimlessly stupefied Questioning the very foundation of existence Lost in what went wrong
6.
Hurt 04:17
I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain The only thing that's real The needle tears a hole The old familiar sting Try to kill it all away But I remember everything What have I become My sweetest friend? Everyone I know Goes away in the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt I wear this crown of thorns Upon my liar's chair Full of broken thoughts I cannot repair Beneath the stains of time The feelings disappear You are someone else I am still right here What have I become My sweetest friend? Everyone I know Goes away in the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt If I could start again A million miles away I will keep myself I would find a way
7.
Always Love 04:00
Darling, what did you say? Do you want to go out Or do you want to stay? Darling, why does it hurt to pray? I can't figure out what you're feeling Darling, when will this end? I wish I had more answers I wish it were pretend Darling, keep holding tight 'Cause there's not much I can do for you Except love Always love Even when the sun goes down When you're on the ground and hurting I will love Always love Even in the worst of times When it feels like there's no light I will love Always love Even when it breaks you down When you're on your knees from fighting I will love Always love I will love Always love I will love Always love Even when the clouds cover the sky When there's darkness every night The sun will always be there, burning bright There's still a chance to see some light

about

Rose Water is my first commercial concept album as a songwriter, pianist, and vocalist. It chronicles the intense suffering my wife endured during the first four years of our marriage.

From depression ("Shockwave"), chronic illness and parasites ("Rose Water"), to the loss of her father to suicide ("Dusk at Dawn," "Hurt"). Being a spouse to someone who goes through so much can also take a toll. It requires patience, compassion, and an unbelievable amount of love. Which often takes the form of choice, rather than feeling. I've messed up along the way ("In Good and Bad Times"), but I've also learned, through her suffering, that nothing helps someone more in situations like this than simply being there and loving them endlessly ("Always Love").

The album blends raw, poetic story-telling in the genres of alternative, indie, and symphonic rock.

credits

released November 6, 2020

Music and Lyrics composed, arranged, produced, and performed by Tony Manfredonia
Music mixed and mastered by Trey Hodge
Guitar ("In Good and Bad Times," "Hurt") by Trey Hodge
Additional production ("In Good and Bad Times") by Trey Hodge
Additional Lyrics ("Dusk at Dawn") written and performed by Maria Manfredonia
Violin ("Dusk at Dawn") by Nat Willow

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Tony Manfredonia Petoskey, Michigan

Tony Manfredonia, the Michigan-based composer and singer-songwriter, creates captivating and emotionally charged music. With his symphonic, cinematic, and dynamic sound, he takes listeners on a passionate journey.

From symphonic rock albums to pop-piano ballads, and from instrumental suites to video game soundtracks, his genre-bending orchestral expertise shine through in everything he creates.
... more

contact / help

Contact Tony Manfredonia

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

If you like Tony Manfredonia, you may also like: